The Disney Main Female is more of a canon than a line of characters that Disney deems as important. So are Esmeralda’s behaviors in Hunchback of Notre Dame applicable to how other so call Disney’s Princess Behaviors? Let’s compare Esmeralda against the  the rules presented in the Video “How to make a guy like you” and see how she does.

( Note There are 21 Rules, they write 16 twice, Video is meant to be funny)

21. Show him you can look good no matter what you’re wearing.

Check

Esmeralda, Quasimodo and Phoebus Disney Hunchback of Notre dame picture image

Esmeralda, Quasimodo and Phoebus leaving Notre Dame

 

 

 

 

 

 

20. Use Body Language.

Check, Esmeralda is working it

Disney Esmeralda Hunchback of Notre Dame Dance picture Image

Esmeralda’s Dance Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

 

 

 

 

 

 

19. Make him jealous.

Check, she kisses all main three guys @_@

Esmeralda and Frollo Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Esmeralda giving Frollo a peak on the nose Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

Esmeralda getting close to Quasimodo Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

Esmeralda getting close to Quasimodo Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

18. Be a friends to nature’s animals.

Check, at least Djali, she doesn’t interact that much with other animals

Djali, Esmeralda, and Phoebus Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Djali, Esmeralda, and Phoebus Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

17. Act scared of him.

No, not even, she clocks him right in the face

Phoebus Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image hit in the face by Esmeralda

Phoebus being hit by Esmeralda Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

16. Rush into it. Don’t bother getting to know each other ahead of time.

Check, a kiss on the lips is what seals it in a Disney movie

Phoebus and Esmeralda Kiss Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Phoebus and Esmeralda Kiss Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

 

 

 

 

 

 

15. Look deeply into his eyes.

Check, she’s guilty

Esmeralda and Phoebus Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Esmeralda and Phoebus Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

 

 

 

 

 

 

14. Pretend like you would want him even if he wasn’t a prince. (yeah, right.)

No, there is no royalty in the movie and she is more put off by Phoebus’s position as a Knight/ Nobel

Esmeralda and Djali Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Esmeralda and Djali reactiom to Phoebus’ name Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

13. Having a wicked step-mother never hurts.

N/A, This Lady just looks like Lady Tremaine (Cinderella) doesn’t she?

Frollo's Female Doppelganger singing a line in God Help the Outcast Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Frollo’s Female Doppelganger singing a line in God Help the Outcast Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

Lady Tremaine Disney Cinderella picture image

Lady Tremaine Disney Cinderella

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

12. Never do what your parents tell you to do. They only want what’s best for you.

N/A, no one really ever told her what to do and she doesn’t have parents to get in her way

Esmeralda Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Esmeralda exerting some power Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

 

 

 

 

 

 

11. Be constantly happy. Bottle up any negative emotions you have until after the wedding bells have rung.

It’s hard to say, she’s no negative-nelly but she’s not little miss sunshine either, mmmm after some thought I’m going to say yes, Check

Esmeralda Disney Hunchback of Notre dame picture image

Esmeralda Disney Hunchback of Notre dame

 

 

 

 

 

 

10. Trust EVERYONE.

Pretty much

Archdeacon and Esmeralda Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame face picture image

Archdeacon and Esmeralda Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

9. Don’t bother being intelligent. It won’t help you that much.

No, I guess I’d give her Street Smarts though.

Esmeralda, Djali, Brute and Oaf Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Esmeralda, Djali, Brute and Oaf Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

8. Always be prepared, even if this mean carrying around glass shoes in your pocket.

Check, note the knife strapped to her calf

Esmeralda and Quasimodo Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Esmeralda defying Frollo by helping Quasimodo Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

7. Be Sweet and innocent…until you want to kiss him.

No, No, No, “She’s been around,” consult the DVD Audio Commentary  for more

Esmeralda and Phoebus Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Esmeralda and Phoebus Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

 

 

 

 

 

 

6. Disregard his personal boundaries and make him feel like an idiot.

Check, Kind of a Derpy looking Phoebus huh?

Phoebus Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame cross eyes picture iamge

Phoebus crosse-eyed Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

 

 

 

 

 

 

5. Cry…simple, but effective.

No, she sulks

Esmeralda sulks Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Esmeralda sulks Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

 

 

 

 

 

 

4. When you first meet, remain completely anonymous.

Check, they don’t even speak until their third encounter

Achilles Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Achilles Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

 

 

 

 

 

 

3. Pretend like you’re dead.

Check

Esmeralda and Quasimodo Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Quasimodo thinking Esmeralda has died Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2. Sing to them (why this works, I shall never know.)

No, but Belle never sang to Beast and yet it counts in the video,  Esmeralda does sing a solo though which more than Jasmine got. 1/2 point

Esmeralda singing God Help the Outcast Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Esmeralda singing God Help the Outcast Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

1. ALWAYS leave hims wanting more.

Check, in spades

Esmeralda Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Esmeralda Dancing Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

Esmeralda Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image red dress

Esmeralda Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

Disney Esmeralda Hunchback of Notre Dame Dance picture image

Esmeralda’s Dance Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

 

 

 

 

 

 

Because I’m not counting the parental questions that makes 19 in total. She scores 13.5.   13.5/19 = 71%

Well, well, well Esmeralda acts more like a Disney Princess than some give her credit for, too bad she doesn’t cry or have Parental units.

What do you people think, should Esmeralda be made a Disney Princess? Remember, it’s an archetype not a hierarchical position.

The Someday reviews are coming… someday (Lame Joke, tis my destiny)

One Thought on “Esmeralda Versus How to Make a Guy Like You – Disney Princess Style

  1. Brittany on 04/14/2016 at 11:50 pm said:

    I think that she is capapble of being one. Who cares if she doesn’t follow the Disney Princess Protocal, she did whatever she thought was the right thing to do. Even if it meant dying for a little while and then coming back to life.

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