This is a list of the worst Live-Action Fairy Tale movies that were reviewed. This list was hard to compose because there was just so many bad movies and they were bad in different ways. Some were just bad, some confused the source material the point of insanity and some did both. But when is came down it it came to a question of which one would I rather watch again.

Also a note I’m adding two posts on movies that I personally was disappointed in and ones I liked were were surprised by, these movies also do not appear on the Best/Worst lists.


Number #10


Mila Kunis as Theodora Oz The Great and Powerful picture image

Mila Kunis as Theodora

 Oz the Great and Powerful – This one made the list more on wasted potential and its odd casting. Mila Kunis and James Franco were just too ill suited in their roles. There were just too many odd other choices to ignore, like none of the characters have good motivations. The movie does have nice technicals like the China Girl but a lot of the techicals come at the expense of the characters. Plus Mila Kunis as the wicked witch was just silly.


Number #9

Amanda Seyfried as Valerie Red Riding Hood picture image

Amanda Seyfried as Valerie

Red riding Hood – Yes, this movie sucks and is pretty much a Twilight version of Little Red Riding Hood.  I get the feeling though that people working of it more less knew that and just went on because it’s a paid check. However given some of the other movies, I would rather watch this one. Plus the very first time I watch it I didn’t hate it as much as I thought I would so that is something, granted I was hanging out with people and having fun so the movie might have been a mute point.


Number #8

Tom Hanks as Allen & Daryl Hannah as Madison Splash picture image

Tom Hanks as Allen & Daryl Hannah as Madison

Splash  – I know a lot of people out there like this movie but I found all the characters so unlikable. The plot also sucks with the mermaid time limit, the weird rules and the whole government thing.  It’s dumb and unlikable.  Plus it lost me the second they said let’s look at Cape Cod, stupid movie.


Number #7

Emily Blunt as The Baker's Wife, James Corden as The Baker and Daniel Huttlestone as Jack Into the Woods Picture image

Emily Blunt as The Baker’s Wife, James Corden as The Baker and Daniel Huttlestone as Jack

Into the Woods – If Splash under explained its plot than Into the Woods over explains it to the point where you don’t even need to watch the movie, just listen to it in another room. I mean what’s the point of a visual median if you don’t need to watch the thing?  Though to be fair this movie is so dark and devoid of good visuals anyway that you’re not even missing anything.  It’s really disappointing since that could have made the visual interesting and they didn’t and with musical movie you need or it’s get boring, like this one.

Number #6

Alex Pettyfer as Hunter/Kyle and Vanessa Hudgens as Lindy Beastly picture image

Alex Pettyfer as Hunter/Kyle and Vanessa Hudgens as Lindy

Beastly – Yet another Twilight-eque take on a Fairy tale. In this world being bland and tattoo is super ugly and if you don’t live in Manhattan you might as well just kill yourself because you’re in exile. This one is just shallow, vapid and stupid. I mean really the guy won the girl with quite literally candy and flowers.

Number #5

Amanda Bynes as Sydney with The Seven Dorks Sydney White picture image

Amanda Bynes as Sydney with The Seven Dorks

Sydney White – Oh this one is so stupid that it hurts. The sad part is that I think the movie thinks that it is indeed being clever and funny, which it is not. Also I hate the whole girl is cool because like a dude but with a vagina. Hated this movie.

Number #4

Kristen Stewart as Snow White & Chris Hemsworth as The Huntsmen Snow White and the Huntsmen picture image

Kristen Stewart as Snow White & Chris Hemsworth as The Huntsmen

Snow White and the Huntsmen – It’s a kick-ass Snow white movie, problem is the girl doesn’t do much of anything except for the one thing a man taught her.  There just so much just wrong with this movie that it’s impossible to put it one paragraph. But it a chaotic mess that promised an active Snow White but didn’t not. The only thing we really get is a screaming Charlize Theron in some cool costumes but that isn’t enough, it’s really nothing.

Number #3

Angelina Jolie as Maleficent picture image

Angelina Jolie as Maleficent

Maleficent – This movie is just so misguided that it’s a wonder that they actually made it. It’s basic a Frozen and Wicked knock-off just with Sleeping Beauty. But what really gets me is that they took the Mistress of all Evil and made her a scorned woman who was really a good fairy. Just so much No. Also so was more a prankster than an evil villain.

Number #2

Matt Damon as Will and Health Ledger as Jacob The Brothers Grimm picture image

Matt Damon as Will and Health Ledger as Jacob

The Brothers Grimm – The idea behind this movie might have been good but the excution was beyond annoying. The jokes were not funny and character all sucked.  Everything and I do mean everything about this movie was pure rancid vomit that at no point was I entertained or amused.  Why was this even made? Who gave someone the money to make this?

Number #1

Eliza Bennett as Snow White Grimm's Snow White picture image

Eliza Bennett as Snow White

Grimm’s Snow White – What can really be said about a movie when the people making it had the intention and the hope that no one watching it was paying attention? Beyond that I just don’t know what to say about this movie as it’s not telling the story of Snow White that I’m not even sure why the threw in the elements and slap the name on it in the first place. First off this is more of a Lord of the Ring knock-off than a Snow White but also Snow white is Blonde, it’s just what the fuck is this? The Dwarves are Elves and the Evil Queen wants some Star Fire. Even if the plot misses the point of either source there nothing else that this movie offers of substance, the characters were so devoid of anything that you can’t even call them characters and the technicals are cringeworthy.

This is the worst thing I have ever seen. This movie makes Happy N’ever After and Milo’s return look like works of brilliance and those movies are shit.  Grimm’s Snow White isn’t even shit, it’s the festering bowels  of a beached whale carcass that is so corrupted by the polluted waters that it will not wither away into nothingness.

The real question is what is worse Grimm’s Snow White or The Swan Princess: A Royal Family Tale? That is too tough to even think about.

Oz The Great and Powerful picture image

Oz The Great and Powerful

Basically one day, some Disney executive smoked a joint and thought “let’s have a prequel to The Wizard of Oz” but someone told them there was already a prequel floating around called Wicked. But the executive ignored that story and decided to throw money at pretty obvious prequel story based on the Wizard’s origins without the aid of the original source material by L.Frank Baum. And the result was Oz The Great and Powerful.

If I sound like I dislike this movie, I really didn’t hate it, I mean I didn’t like it either. It does something nicely but it has a lot of flaws and the story is just typical.

James Franco as Oz and Michelle Williams as Glinda Oz The Great and Powerful picture image

James Franco as Oz and Michelle Williams as Glinda

Oz is side-show magician who is also a con-man womanizer. He wants to be a great man like Tesla Ruining, Elephant killing, reason for L.A,  Thomas Edison. One day he gets in trouble with an audience and a strongman and he escapes in hot air balloon and get sucks into tornado and lands in the whimsical land of OZ. He meets a pretty lady named Theodaora the good, a witch. She tells Oz that he is the wizard of prophesy who save the land and rule OZ. Then they get attacked by the wicked witch’s minion. As they make their way to the Emerald City, Oz flirts with Theodora and she being an innocent naive lady believes him and thinks he is going to marry her. He also meets a flying monkey named Finley who becomes Oz’s servant

At the Emerald City Oz meets Theodora’s sister, Evanora. Evanora tells Oz he needs to kill the wicked witch before he can become king. So he leaves with Finley but doesn’t tell Theodora. Evanora then starts manipulating Theodora against Oz.

On their way to a dark forest they see that city that was attacked by the Wicked Witch and they meet a China Girl. Oz fixes her broken legs and joins the party. They sees the wicked witch but she is actually Glinda the Good Witch of the North and the daughter of the original king of OZ who got murdered. Evanora is revealed the real wicked witch. Theodora then gets mad at Oz for being with Glinda, Evanora gives Theodora an apple to remove her heart and as result Theodora’s skin changes to green and she is wicked. Evanora then attacks Oz and crew. They escape with Glinda’s bubbles and they go to Munchkin land.

Oz and crew plan an attack using Oz’s skills of illusion and misdirection. They win and Theodora leaves and Glinda beats Evanora who is actually an ugly hag. Oz then rules OZ as the Wizard of OZ. The end.

The China Girl Oz The Great and Powerful picture image

The China Girl

With Oz The Great and Powerful we have three movies within the same universe that are VASTLY different in tones and style. The original 1939 movie is fun and light-hearted while the sequel Return to Oz is classic 80’s dark children faire. Oz The Great and Powerful is sort of in middle of those tones but it’s very unapologetic in its modern sense of story telling.

Like the main character who wants more from life and to be the very best like no-one ever was. There is also a prophecy about the chosen one. More than that, the movie reveals in the 3D theatre experience where it just take it’s time for the pretty CG stuff to sink in, which are fine on the whole. The China Girl was one of the best CGs I have seen in a long time. The shine and shadows on her were wonderful. She was also the only character with any sense of pathos.

Also speaking of the other movies. The 1939 movie made it clear that OZ was a dream and Return To Oz was the nightmare though it was a little more vague in Reurn to Oz. However is straight up Oz subtitle the Great and Powerful it’s not a dream, it’s real. Which makes it confusing when there  are characters in Kansas that are the basis for characters in the land of OZ  most notably Michelle Williams as Annie who is a former lover of Oz’s as well as Glinda.

Rachel Weisz as Evanora Oz The Great and Powerful picture image

Rachel Weisz as Evanora

Then we have the casting. The casting is very problematic in this movie. There is something about James Franco. I don’t know what it but I do not buy it. He seems to lack the charm and charisma that this character needs. However he is not this biggest casting mistake. That would be Mila Kunis as Theodora. Her naive innocence, which should have been core to the character was not believable but Kunis was better in that capacity than her as the Wicked Witch, which she did not pull off at all. It bordered on being silly but in a very boring way. Michelle Williams and Rachel Weisz were fine in their roles. Only the China Girl and the flying Money did the best and the were just voice acting.

Mila Kunis as Theodora Oz The Great and Powerful picture image

Mila Kunis as Theodora

This movie may seem like character driven movie but it exist more as a technical piece because once you start asking about characters and motivation there isn’t a lot there. The character that should have been interesting is Theodora but her “broken” was the most rushed and illogical turning point ever. She get a broken heart because Oz talks to Glinda, that is it. I mean yes, Evanora turned her against him but in a movie that allowed for few minutes of showing Oz travel down the river to rush a major moment was sloppy. Also the make-up for the wicked witch was beyond bad.  Theodora was wasted.

Bubble travel Oz The Great and Powerful picture image

Bubble travel

If your going to watch Oz The Great and Powerful watch it for some of the technicals, like the China Girl and some of the imagery. Don’t want it for an compelling story or interesting characters, you will not find it on this yellow or red brick road.

Since October is a theme month we going with Live-Action fairy tale-ish movies that in keep with said theme, more or less, so  Clue 1 and Clue 2