Episode 17: Her Handsome Hero

Emilie de Ravin as Belle & Wes Brown as Gaston Once Upon a Time Season 5 Episode 17 Her Handsome Hero review picture image

Emilie de Ravin as Belle & Wes Brown as Gaston

Not one for mixing references but they could have given Gaston the surname of Leroux but instead they went with LeGume as in a bean. Is Gaston’s Kingdom in bean trading? Or they COULD have made it Avenant from the 40’s version as it was name originally considered for Gaston.

This is a Belle heavy episode and she puts her foot down on Rumple using Dark Magic. Hades enlists the help of Gaston to get his revenge on Rumple for his death. Hades does this since he knows Belle will insist that Rumple not hurt Gaston. Hades also makes Belle a deal that if Gaston or Rumple knock the other into the River of Lost Souls, her baby is safe. Belle tries to save Gaston but ends up pushing him into the water to save Rumple. Oops and it doesn’t free the child from the contract.

The reason for this is supposedly souls make Hades more powerful and he doesn’t like the hope going around town as flowers are starting to grow. Flowers growing from hope is super sappy. Hades, you seem like a god of moderate intelligence, why not just let Hook and everyone go and count your loses? Sure your down some souls but there is no hope floating around. Sounds like a win-win. Instead he does more antagonist stuff and pines for Zelena.

Past plot was Gaston is a jerk who doesn’t like ogres but does like Belle. Gaston is a nicer rendition of his Disney-self. Was it just me or did the ogre looks similar to Quasimodo? Especially in the opening sequence. Oddly Her Handsome Hero sounds like Star Wars. As it’s a story about compassion and forgiveness, though lots of stories are about that. And LeFou got a name drop, which is more than Olaf got in season 4.

B plot is simple. Emma has a scary dream and it turns out to be Ruby/Red.

This episode was alright. Not a huge fan of Belle and Rumple anymore. Rumple did make a point about dark and light being a point of view. As Belle was ok with stealing property to help someone even though that didn’t happen.

Episode 18: Ruby Slippers

Meghan Ory as Red/Ruby & Teri Reeves as Dorothy Once Upon a Time Season 5 Episode 18Ruby Slippers review picture image

Meghan Ory as Red/Ruby & Teri Reeves as Dorothy

Is some ways this is a filler episode as it takes focus off the Hades’ plot, which is fine, but it does somethings to move things a little bit. The theme of this episode it to take the risk on love. Zelena does it with Hades and Ruby does it will Dorothy.

Ruby and Mulan’s quest leads them to OZ to find Ruby’s pack. They get there just as Zelena returns and they meet up with Dorothy as Zelena dog-naps Toto in exchange for the slippers. Other than hating Zelena, there was no point in Dorothy keeping the shoes. The crew’s plan is to put Zelena to sleep with the poppy sleeping potion. Dorothy and Ruby bond while getting the poppies and Ruby crushes hard on Dorothy. After the potion is made Dorothy goes off on her own and Zelena puts her in a sleeping curse and takes the slippers. As Dorothy just has the love of OZ she doesn’t have true love.

Ruby follows Zelena to UnderBrooke and hijinx ensue. Mainly they want to get Aunty Em to blow a kiss into a bottle but Hades liquidates Aunt Em to make Zelena happy. While that is happening the Haunting booth is removed and Snow begs David to leave with Ruby with the slippers that Zelena did give back. Snow can’t leave because her name is on the headstone BUT Hook crossed her name off so David stays for her. Hades enchanted his Hook so he could engrave names on the stones. So Snow leaves with Ruby. Ruby kisses Dorothy and she wakes up and Snow goes back to Neal. Also Belle figures she doesn’t have nine month to save her child so she puts herself under a sleeping curse, that Zelena gave her. Not sure if that was a great plan.

Let’s just unpack Belle’s plan. The Sleeping curse on her was practical matter by the show as Belle’s actress was pregnant hence the big red coat she wears. You can see her abdomen sometimes. So this was just a necessity. If you look at in the context of the show, sleeping curses do stop aging but does that apply to an embryo? Shrugs. Doesn’t seem like a great plan but not sure how much Hades REALLY cares about Belle and Rumple’s kid, he just likes the leverage and deals.

Then there is the crux of this episode Mulan is all still alone. Ruby and Dorothy are true loves because I guess they both felt like outsiders and liked dogs. Not a bad start to things. I hope Mulan will finds someone too. She was cute with Ruby but I guess they were just friends on a mission to find Ruby a place in the world, and she did. To be fair, I don’t know what’s up with Dorothy. I don’t mean her character but her costume. Can’t quite put my finger on it but it looks like something out of steampunk. With two patterns going on. Warrior grab with a gingham skirt? NOT sure hot to feel about that one other than confused. The pairing on Ruby and Dorothy was ok but it was contained to one episode so while there is an attachment to Ruby and Mulan, there isn’t one to Dorothy as show depicts her.

Another curiosity in this episode is the guy removing the Haunting Booth is named Claude. I do feel like I’m being mocked here. First the lady at the dinner, then the ogre now a random dude named “Claude.”

This episode was fine. Ruby and Dorothy got their happy endings while the others are in Hell. Still not bad not amazing but it was ok episode.



Melody & Quasimodo, Enchanted Tales, Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Melody & Quasimodo, Enchanted Tales, Hunchback of Notre Dame

Where do you start critiquing The Enchanted Tales version of The Hunchback of Notre Dame? Everything is wrong with this adaptation. They got nothing right, even most of the names are wrong. I may complain about every other version but at least they got the basics right, Enchanted tales can’t even do that much.

Melody and her team of annoying instruments Enchanted tales The Hunchback of Notre Dame picture images

Melody and her team of annoying instruments

Well they got the basic basics, we have a guy who sports a hunch who rings the bells at Notre Dame and likes a Gypsy girl who dances. That’s it!

Now we have a Gypsy who is in fact some sort a sorceress as she makes instruments come to life with annoying personalities. That is the most niche super power ever, but instead of Esmeralda her name is Melody and she being pursued by a rich egomaniac named Jean-Claude.

Melody with Handsome Quasimodo Enchanted Tales Hunchback of Notre Dame  picture image

Melody with “Handsome” Quasimodo

The name changes and annoying instruments are the least the problems; Quasimodo isn’t deformed, he’s handsome. He has hunch because he was sad and had low-esteem. This is just wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong a thousand times wrong. Then to add to to this cacophony of ass-ness they tell children that looks don’t matter if people think you’re attractive. Looks don’t matter if you’re pretty. I suppose personality don’t matter either since Quasimodo does not have one. So we have terrible moral to boot.

Jean-Claude putting the moves on Melody again Enchanted Tales Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Jean-Claude putting the moves on Melody again

The main issue with the Enchanted Tales version is despite calling it The Hunchback of Notre Dame, this adaptation plays out and feels like a Beauty and the Beast knock-off. The power of love pretty much changes Quasimodo’s appearance which Melody claims to have accepted when he was ugly. That or that swing did wonders for his hair. Seriously his hair gets pushed back and instant Disney Prince. Also Jean-Claude looks exactly like Gaston and we have enchanted objects that dance around.

Melody and a handome Quasimodo Enchanted Tales Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Melody and a “handome” Quasimodo

It’s like the creators on Enchanted Tales were told that Disney is making The Hunchback of Notre Dame, they were told the bare basics of the original story and decided that it’s close enough to Beauty and the Beast and ran with that to make a half-assed stupidly annoying tale with the worst moral EVER!

Next Time – Melody a.k.a Not-Esmeralda

Melody, a.k.a Not Esmeralda,Enchanted Tales, Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Melody, a.k.a Not Esmeralda, Enchanted Tales, Hunchback of Notre Dame

Hey It’s a Youtube Poop Video by Dinner Warrior. I confess I like Frollo and Gaston as a Comic Duo

(Via Dinner Warrior’s Description)
Transcription (spoiler warning):

Narrator: There’s no intro.
Frollo: You know I have head lice.
Gaston: That’s nothing, I have ticks.
Le Fou: Every guy here loves you Gaston.
Gaston: No shit, this is a gay bar and every last inch of me’s waxed… not!
Frollo: Shall we review your alphabet today?
Gaston: I can’t read.
LeFou: Gaston, you fail at life.
Frollo: Then tell me Maria, why I see her dancing there… what? Why the hell is Lady Gaga in my fireplace?
Le Fou: Gosh that girl disturbs me Gaston.
Gaston: I know, me too.
Ratcliffe: The ladies of court will friend me on twitter when they see how I glitter.
Frollo: Eat my tacos. I have fish tacos, beef tacos, chicken tacos. I have it all! Made with real meat, real cheese, real corn.
Gaston: Hello Frollo, I’ll have four-dozen tacos and a large pepsi and for dessert I’ll have jello.
Frollo: It’s yours.
Tomo: I’m a taco. AHHH!
Frollo: I’ll find her. I’ll find Hellen if I have to burn down all of Troy!
Gaston: Iliad.
Frollo: I am a fish.
Gaston: Manatee.
Ratcliffe: Cheep-cheep!
Gaston: Every last inch of Waxonator’s covered with memes.
Osaka: Well, see ya!

The Differences post is coming…..soon

So as I was working on my God Help the Outcast I noticed things that didn’t fit into song content so I’m posting them now. (Beware I run off on a bit of a tangent)


Quasimodo listening to Esmeralda singing God Help the Outcast Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Quasimodo listening to Esmeralda singing God Help the Outcast Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

Quasimodo watching to Esmeralda during God Help the Outcast Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Quasimodo watching to Esmeralda during God Help the Outcast Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame








I once agian suspect that the Disney Production team didn’t read the book (well maybe a few did), I say this because in the book Quasimodo is deaf but here in the Disney movie Quasimodo has such a amazing hearing. He can hear a soft ballad in the sanctuary all the way in the bell tower. I don’t think it was necessary to have Quasimodo listening in on Esmeralda. They did it to include Quaismodo since he had not been in the movie for 5 whole minutes. I mean it also worked to get Esmeralda and Quasimodo to reunite and  to give them a chance to bond but they couldn’t have thought up another way.



Frollo's Female Doppelganger singing a line in God Help the Outcast Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Frollo’s Female Doppelganger singing a line in God Help the Outcast Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

Disney Frollo Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Judge Claude Frollo








The Lady who asks for love. Frollo’s twin sister? Could be. Frollo has no back story so he could have a sister. My guess is since they look so much a like and look to be the some age, they’re twins. What else is Frollo hiding in his past? I want back stories, Disney. It’s interesting to learn what pushes a character to doing less than wholesome things. Like;

Ursula Disney The Little Mermaid picture image

Ursula Disney The Little Mermaid

Why was Ursula exiled? Many speculate that Ursula is Triton  sister but  maybe Triton pulled a  coup d’état and stole the kingdom from the octopus people. That makes sense but it would make Triton look bad. Really Disney don’t say that Urusala once lived in the palace and was exiled if your  not going to into why she was exiled.



Gaston Disney Beauty and the Beast picture image

Gaston Disney Beauty and the Beast


Why did Gaston like Belle? I mean sure she’s pretty and Gaston is a shallow idiot but she didn’t feed his ego and that’s what he needs. He is governed by outward appearances, but where did this superficiality come from? His upbringing?




Jafar Disney Aladdin picture image

Jafar Disney Aladdin

Why was Jafar so stupid? He sent years searching for the Cave of Wonders so he could get the lamp so he get three wishes and the when that plans fails his bird tells him to marry the princess. However, Jafar had military control over the city-state and a  mind control ring. My goodness, is Jafar one stupid idiot, it would have taken his less time and energy to pull a coup d’état and I’m sure the people of  Agrabah wouldn’t have notice a shift in power. The Sultan seems more interested in  toys than his people. My guess is Jafar was drop repeatedly as a baby and that him more than a little dense.


Frollo Hunchback of Notre Dame Disney picture imageBut Frollo had a job, control and perhaps an deep emotional  connection with a women who prays for love. I have to wonder if Frollo is so tightly wound and his sister wants love, what was their family dynamic like growing up? Assuming that she is his sister, but she looks too much like Frollo for  it be coincidental where as the rest of crowds look generic.


Who do you think that lady in Notre Dame is? Think she could be important or just some extra that looks like Frollo and nothing more? Opinions, Thoughts, Anything!