Monica Cruz picture image

Monica Cruz

The Max Ryan movie, we meet again. If people who read this blog will recall when I first mention the Ryan movie like over a year ago it seemed very theoretical but it’s real and it is happening. As it is stand, core characters have yet been cast or have not been announced yet, like Esmeralda or Frollo. According to cinema.theiapolis.com Monica Cruz and John Rhys-Davies are (or were) in negotiations for Esmeralda and Frollo. Now what is interesting is that Steven Berkoff is listed as in negotiations too and he is on the cast list on IMDB. So really who knows where Cruz and Rhys-Davies stand. So let’s just consider Monica Cruz as a possibility for Esmeralda.

Monica Cruz picture image

Monica Cruz

I know nothing about her aside from the fact that she Penelope Cruz’s younger sister and as a joke on 30 Rock said, younger hotter sister. Really, they look a lot a like. Cruz doesn’t have the same long filmography as her sister so I would be lying if I said I have seen much of her sample of work. What I can gather about Cruz from what I have seem is that she is cast for being attractive. She along with her sister are both dancers who have been trained, Cruz studied Flamenco and traditional ballet at The Royal Academy of Dance. So if she were cast it would promise as good dance number.

Monica Cruz picture image

Monica Cruz

Cruz is too old to play Esmeralda as she is the book. Cruz is 38 and Esmeralda is 16. Can a movie cover it up and make Esmeralda older? If the film maker wants yes, they can also put the setting on the moon if they want, doesn’t make a good idea. But really it’s mute point. Most of the time the character Esmeralda is changed so much anyway that making her like her like she is the book would be novel. Esmeralda is typically overtly sexual and with the casting of Cruz that is what it seems they are (or were) going for.

Monica Cruz picture image

Monica Cruz

Cruz does have a good look. Esmeralda is supposed to have an exotic look. Films version seldom do the backstory as the book has it, where she the daughter of a French woman and an unknown father. But that dark sultry look seems to the going look for Esmeraldas. Personally I can see an actress of Spanish decent or Indian being good in the role. So Cruz has it in the looks department.

Monica Cruz picture image

Monica Cruz

Would Cruz be a good Esmeralda for this movie version of Hunchback? I can’t say but I would say yes given the standards ideas Hollywood has for the character even though the Max Ryan version is an independent movie. Then again this version has a giant in it so my opinion of this movie is low and I’m not sure how good it will be in the first place.

Last week this Live Action Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame Fan Casting came up on my google alerts. So let’s review their choices.

First off on the whole this article seems to think singing is needed in the casting though so far none of the Live-action Disney versions have been musicals so that shouldn’t be  a factor.

Josh Gad as Quasimodo

Josh Gad for Quasimodo picture image

Josh Gad

I don’t see it. Gad has a goofy comedian vibe but I don’t see him as sweet, insecure Disney Quasimodo. I would hate, HATE to say it but he is better suited for Hugo and I hope the Gargoyles would be cut out or at the very least CLEAR figments of Quasimodo’s imagination.

Rosario Dawson as Esmeralda

 

Rosario Dawson for Esmeralda picture image

Rosario Dawson

I’m a little torn on this one. On the one hand I can see her pulling of Esmeralda as Disney depicted her but on the other hand I don’t think she is the best casting choice there is.

I think Disney should try for some Bollywood IT girl or something. Deepika Padukone is popular fan choice as well as Priyanka Chopra who is one few Bollywood actors to make the jump to Hollywood as she on ABC’s Quantico which makes Chopra the first South Asian to headline an American network drama series.   Or Jana Perez would be a good option for Esmeralda and has the benefit of being in another Live action Disney movie before like Mr. Gad.

Zachary Levi as Phoebus

Zachary Levi for Phoebus picture image

Zachary Levi

I can see this one working. He has the right type of look for Phoebus and could pull off Phoebus’ witty and brave personality.

Alan Rickman as Frollo

 

Alan Rickman for Frollo picture image

Alan Rickman

This a yes and a no. First yes, Rickman as Frollo is like ideal casting that people all want but for Disney Frollo, it’s a little more iffy on that super austere design he has. But considering Disney Frollo’s design is based on Sir Cedric Hardwicke and Rickman has a similar screen presence I will go with a yes. I agree.

Neil Patrick Harris as Clopin

Neil Patrick Harris for Clopin picture image

Neil Patrick Harris

Again yes and no. Harris could pull off Clopin’s personality BUT he does not have the look. His look should resemble Esmeralda unless there something in the script to address it. Like Clopin in the book was the head of thieves I.E the Court of Miracles and not the leader of the Gypsies. In Disney movie he is the leader of  Gypsies. So it’s up to the script and or filmmakers who they can cast. But I think  the role should go to  someone else.

What do you think. Do you like these suggestions?

Adam Sandler picture image

Adam Sandler

If you thought last week’s Anti-Hypothetical Casting post was scary this sone is downright horrific because while Kim Kardashian has the means to set-up herself as Esmeralda I doubt she has the inclination but I could see Sandler wanting to play Quasimodo.

Adam Sandler picture image

Adam Sandler

Quasimodo is a fairly converted role for actors as not only do they get a very emotional role but they physical side of it also a challenge and though psychical demanding roles are REALLY what gets an actor notice, case-in-point  Eddie Redmayne getting the Oscar for The Theory of Everything. So if Adam Sandler wanted to play Quasimodo could and he would.

Adam Sandler picture image

Adam Sandler

Sandler has roots in comedy but he has been in some dramatic roles. He also has been is a decent amount of okay movies but he has been in so major crap that just seems like he wants to go on a trip with with friends and the movie is just an excuse. Unfortunately this how I see a Sandler attempt at The Hunchback of Notre Dame going. He would get his trip to Paris and have all his friends in the various other roles. You can use you imagination.

Adam Sandler as Opera Man from Saturday Night Live SNL picture image

Adam Sandler as Opera Man from Saturday Night Live

Also unfortunately I can really only in vision Sandler giving Quasimodo just a silly voice and that would be it for the acting front. Somehow I think it would be Opera man. I would say the physical side of the performance would be a reprise of Little Nicky. Also given that it would be an Adam Sandler movie maybe this version would follow suit with Enchanted Tales in that Sandler is actully handsome and he gets the girl in the end. And we would  get Rob Schneider saying “You can do it Quasi” when he saying Esmeralda.

Adam Sandler as Zohan with Emmanuelle Chriqui as Dalia in You Don't Mess with the Zohan picture image

Adam Sandler as Zohan with Emmanuelle Chriqui as Dalia in You Don’t Mess with the Zohan

Though one plus side of Sandler playing Quasimodo is that he could get Emmanuelle Chriqui is a popular choice for the role among people on the internet, though it would seem sad that it be wasted in an Adam Sandler movie.

Kim Kardashian picture image

Kim Kardashian

In my life I have to live with the fact that I have two thing in common with Kim Kardashian, which is two more than I could ever wish. One we are both half Armenian and we share the same birthday though a years apart. Because you may not know it though I do, today is our (eww) birthday. So because I like to scare myself  today we have a terrifying casting idea  which is Kim Kardashian as Esmeralda.

Kim Kardashian as Ava from emptation: Confessions of a Marriage Counselor picture image

Kim Kardashian as Ava from emptation: Confessions of a Marriage Counselor

First off, No! A thousand times NO to this one! Kim Kardashian couldn’t act her way out of a paper bag even if her role was a paper bag. The lady CAN NOT act. I saw a clip from  Temptation:Confessions of a Marriage Counselor in which she played, I have no idea, some lady named Ava. But in that one clip I could see that she was vapid, flat and unpleasant to watch. It’s like she had no idea what acting is or how to read a line.  It wasn’t even that bad kind of acting that is special to behold, it was like wanting to hammer yourself in the head till it stopped.

I maintain my position that Esmeralda is not a complex role to play but Esmeralda as a role is beyond Kim Kardashian acting powers. Now to be fair Kim Kardashian is not known for her acting prowess, she know she for a sex type and being a reality show star, whatever that means. So the mere idea of her being Esmeralda goes against the concept of the original character, a pure girl who is unaware of sexual appeal.

Kim Kardashian picture image

Kim Kardashian

On the acting front she is a Hell No but let’s not forget what acting is really about, how much a person looks like the character. I would say  Kim Kardashian could look like Esmeralda. Esmeralda has dark exotic yet European beauty at least in the book. As I said Kim Kardashian is half Armenian which is also what Helene Segara is ethically. Unlike Helene Segara, Kim Kardashian has a classic Armenian look. While I don’t think Esmeralda was Armenian in the novel, though we don’t know what her father was so she could be anything, Sister Gudule did wonder if Esmeralda could have been the Queen of Armenia in the book so shrugs. My guess it was an exotic place to Sister Gudule but it’s cool that it was mentioned. So Kim Kardashian gets a pass on looks. Though she is a little too old for the role.

Kim Kardashian picture image

Kim Kardashian

Never have I been more scared of an Anti-Hypothetical casting posting. I mean Anti-Hypothetical and Kayne West could do this if the wanted to and can you imagine Kayne West playing Quasimodo opposite Kim Kardashian  as Esmeralda. Being in a slasher flick would be less painful.

Nicolas Cage picture image

Nicolas Cage

I was talking to my friend and he said it’s better for these Anti-Hypothetical Casting post to have an actor who is wrongly appropriate to the character and thus we have Nicolas Not the Bees Cage.

Nicolas Cage as Castor Troy from Face/Off picture image

Nicolas Cage as Castor Troy from Face/Off

Though he did use to be a fairly well regarded actor now Cage has a reputation for being a parody of himself. This is because his sheer levels insanity and those faces he makes. Basically he hams it up for villains. The idea of hims playing Frollo is something of a scary thought but at the same time I would love to seem Cage hamming Frollo up, it would something of a delightful train wreck.

Nicolas Cage picture image

Nicolas Cage

As far as looks go, Cage has a weird face that matches his weird otherworldly expressions. He can either look soft or more angular pending on angle and/or lighting. In my supreme expert opinion I think Frollo should have an angular look as that is how the book depicts the guy. With some make-up he could look the part quite well, isn’t that scary……evil laugh.

Nicolas Cage as Castor Troy from Face/Off picture image

Nicolas Cage as Castor Troy from Face/Off

Cage is oddly good for the role, he known for playing villains and his overlook isn’t bad for the role. Could you just imagine Cage making insane faces and yelling, “Chose the Grace or my bed!”    It would be either  the most glorious thing ever put to film or the scariest.

Special Note- All this month every Wednesday there is will  be some very scary Anti-Hypothetical Casting posts.

Jane Lynch picture image

Jane Lynch

 

When it was first suggested to me to by Esmee I actually confused Jane Lynch for Jamie Lee Curtis, I don’t watch Glee. However I did see her when she was in an episode of Arrested Development  and in Christopher Guest’s Best in Show and I can say she is completely wrong in type for Sister Gudule.

Jane Lynch as Coach Sue Sylvester Glee picture image

Jane Lynch as Coach Sue Sylvester from Glee

First off, Jane Lynch is a comedy actress so that would mean for her to be cast they film would have to be silly AND follow Esmeralda’s backstory. Wait a sec did they already to that? However even in the 1999 French parody version, Sister Gudule’s counterpart was not a major characters. There is just something wrong making a woman who lost her chid in to a role that would NEED a comedic actress.

Jane Lynch picture image

Jane Lynch

Second, Jane Lynch is a tall lady at 6 feet, she doesn’t seem like a delicate flower. Though maybe Sister Gudule isn’t a delicate flower but she is Esmeralda’s mother and her nickname of Chantfleurie seems to indicate a small fair lady.

Jane Lynch picture image

Jane Lynch

 

Jane Lynch is one of the last people I would except to play Sister Gudule even if they did a comedic version of the story.

Lea Seydoux picture image

Lea Seydoux

Ah, Ms.Seydoux, we meet again. For those of you who read thehunchblog with some regularity you will recall Lea Seydoux played Belle in the the 2014 French version of Beauty and the Beast, read review here. I didn’t get much into the acting though I did say it was good despite the material, I don’t think there was much to work with in that movie.

 Lea Seydoux as Sabine Moreau in Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol picture image

Lea Seydoux as Sabine Moreau in Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol

As for Lea Seydoux as Fleur-de-Lys, this casting as been recommend a few times and even as a comment on the Belle et La Bete review by Theodore Black. Seydoux is a fairly big name actress, she was in the critically acclaimed Blue is the Warmest Color , Midnight in Paris, Farewell My Queen and a small role in The Grand Budapest Hotel (I love that movie). She has also been other big movies like the 2010 Robin Hood , Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol, Inglourious Basterds, and the new James Bond movie, Spectre. I would say for the role of Fleur-de-Lys the movie would have to be attracting big name actors or have a power-house director or the they would have to up the role of Fleur-de-Lys, or both. Personally I find Fleur-de-Lys more interesting than Esmeralda and one could do a lot with the character other than making her just a haughty bitch, though nothing is wrong with that.

Lea Seydoux as Madeleine Swann in Spectre picture image

Lea Seydoux as Madeleine Swann in Spectre

I think Seydoux has the acting chops for however the film depicts Fleur-de-Lys‘ character. Seydoux has a very warm and natural acting sensibility that translate to most characters she plays.

Lea Seydoux picture image

Lea Seydoux

For looks, Seydoux has a very classic French look. She is lovely but there is an interest to her that makes her interesting than just a typical pretty person. Her seemingly standard look is blond hair and blue eyes, though she does sport other hair colors like brown. Blue eyes and blond hair is the classic foil to Esmeralda’s exotic darker look, so she fits that criteria.

Lea Seydoux picture image

Lea Seydoux

All in all Lea Seydoux would make a flawless Fleur-de-Lys, she is definitely one of the stronger hypothetical casting picks I have posted about. What do you think? Lea Seydoux for Fleur-de-Lys? Or someone else?

Chris Pine picture image

Chris Pine

Recently Chris Pine was suggested for Phoebus but I think I have seen this suggestion before.  Phoebus is an interesting character for films to adapt, he can be the smug jerk or a hero , do so casting for the role is based on what the script calls for, though to be fair you can say that about any character in Hunchback. Pine however would be a good choice for either need, he can be heroic or a jerk.

Chris Pine as James. T Kirk from Star Trek   picture image

Chris Pine as James. T Kirk from Star Trek

Pine has been in a few popular movies, most notably as James T Kirk in the Star Trek reboot. He was also Prince Charming in Into the Woods and a smarmy jerk in that Princess Diary sequel. It’s pretty fair to say that if Pine were casting he probably would follow suit and his Phoebus would be an arrogant yet likable jerk. Maybe not a hero but more likable than book Phoebus but that does take very much.

Chris Pine  picture image

Chris Pine

 

How is Pine for looks. The only thing we really know about Phoebus is he is handsome in a resplendent way with a mustache, most version just make him handsome in a fashionable way. Pine has no complainers in the look department but his fairer features would be a nice contrast to Esmeralda’s darker one so yes Pine looks the part.

Chris Pine  picture image

Chris Pine

Chris Pine seems like  the perfect choice for Phoebus but what do you think?

Jim Carrey picture image

Jim Carrey

I asked on Facebook for a casting suggestion and I got an Anti-Hypothetical Casting for Jim Carrey as Clopin. My first thought was “Oh, Dear God!”

Jim Carrey picture image

Jim Carrey

Jim Carrey is known as a comedy actor so for him to even play Clopin the tone would have to be comedic, which has been done before but I REALLY doubt Hollywood would do that to a Victor Hugo Novel or the casting director would have to high as fuck or bribed. Though maybe Canada would make a humorous Hunchback movie starring Jim Carrey as Clopin. Or the scariest option and one that is more likely, Disney’s Live action remake with Jim Carrey as Clopin.

Jim Carrey  as Lloyd from Dumb and Dumber picture image

Jim Carrey as Lloyd from Dumb and Dumber

But the question is why Jim Carrey shouldn’t play Clopin. To be perfectly frank Jim Carrey is one of those actors who is known for the goofy dumb humor a la Dumb and Dumber, Ace Ventura, etc (I’m sure there are more). However Jim Carrey also has been in a lot of roles that while are comedic they do have a seriousness to them like Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, The Truman Show, etc (again I’m sure there are more). So Carrey wouldn’t be a bad option really if the tone of the movie was in keeping with kind of acting style.

Jim Carrey with Elmo and Telly on Sesame Street picture image

Jim Carrey with Elmo and Telly on Sesame Street

So one on level, I could see him working as Clopin on like how Disney portrayed him, where he is the fun-loving, silly leader of the Court of Miracles. However Carrey isn’t that threatening even though he has played a villain before as Count Olaf in Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Events but it’s not the same as Clopin’s menace.

Jim Carrey picture image

Jim Carrey

I don’t think Jim Carrey would be the worst casting choice for Clopin but I would deeply question it.

Lily James  picture image

Lily James

Skylar suggested in the comments on https://www.thehunchblog.com/2015/03/the-top-ten-worst-non-disney-princess-movies/ that Lily James should play Fleur de Lys, and I agree I think she was make a fine Fleur de Lys.

Lily James as Lady Rose MacClare Downton Abbey picture image

Lily James as Lady Rose MacClare Downton Abbey

Lily James is most well known for her role as Lady Rose MacClare on Downton Abbey and as Cinderella in the 2015 live action version. She is also in a few big name upcoming projects like Natasha in a War and Peace mini-series and playing Lizzie Bennet in Pride and Prejudice and Zombies. She has also been in Fast Girls (which is about running,) Wrath of the Titans, and Secret Diary of a Call Girl . I just want to say this is my third hypothetical casting post with Downton actors.

Lily James as Lady Rose MacClare Downton Abbey  picture image

Lily James as Lady Rose MacClare Downton Abbey

I have seen a few clips of her in Fast Girls and Secret Diary of a Call Girl in addition to Downton Abbey and Cinderella. I’m just going to say that her role as Cinderella is not a very good bias to judge her as Fleur de Lys as she is all sweetness and dreams in that flick. But considering her other work and Rose in Downton Abbey I think that she could carry the role of the haughty yet insecure Fleur de Lys very nicely.

Lily James  picture image

Lily James

As far as looks goes, Lily James sports blonde locks which is the general look for Fluer de Lys, although at times she has brown hair. But more than just her hair, she has this innocence look to her that can look supreme at times. Like a super upper-crust kind of look that a noble like Fleur de Lys would have. In a weird way she reminds me a little bit of Julie Zenatti from original cast of Notre Dame de Paris but I’m not sure why.

Lily James  picture image

Lily James

What do you think, would Lily James make a good Fleur de Lys? Wouldn’t it be cool if he had a Hunchback version that was fill of Downton Actors? And don’t forget to read War and Peace and Pride and Prejudice and Zombies!